I am sitting here at nearly midnight with a huge to do list that I wanted to complete this evening, yet I have achieved only maybe half of, and now I am sitting taking a break and writing this post.
I’m not me unless I have fingers in way too may pies, unless I am juggling endless tasks, and am stressing myself out beyond belief. I cannot take it easy, cannot not volunteer, not offer my help. I wish I could just keep my mouth shut sometimes and not endlessly offer but it’s just not in my nature. I think I was made to be busy, I only wish I could somehow allow myself more time, feel less panicked by my endless to do list, and be a little more organised.
Tomorrow is already crazy busy, full of photo shoots in various locations, children, preparation for the school Christmas Fayre and my book club Christmas Dinner, so now it’s decision time, do I pull an all nighter tonight, can I even do that anymore? My eyes are already burning through lack of sleep last night. Not sure I can do it, something has to give here, but what do I drop? I cannot let anyone down, arrrrrrgh!
Usually I thrive under pressure but tonight I feel panicked and stressed and if I am honest I want to cry, probably if I am honest sob. I’m tired. Maybe this is life after 40? Maybe it’s time to slow down a little — who on earth am I kidding?! I just need sleep, and a step by step plan to tackle the list! Except right now I have deadlines and no time for sleep 🙁